He's Chariman of the Zig and Zag Cumann, you know.

Just on the way into work there, and I was listening to Today FM's Ray D'arcy giving out about Fine Gael removing the pairing arrangement it has with the Government for this week, preventing the Tanaiste, and general wunderkind, Mary Coughlan from visiting the US with Enterprise Ireland. Essentially, the pairing arrangement means that if the opposition know in advance that a government deputy will be absent from the Dail  (perhaps for illness or official business) then the opposition will remove one of its deputies from the vote on a motion, rather sportingly ensuring the government does not suffer from having reduced numbers.

Such gentlemanly procedures were perhaps better suited to happier times; you know, when Ireland wasn't circling the bowl. But in today's world, the pairing system smacks of a silly rule that the insiders have developed which gets in the way of actually representing the people. I must applaud FG for having the cojones to stick it to the government like this (and yes, yes, I am a Blueshirt!). But even objectively, I think this is a good move.

So I am perplexed as to why so many Irish people seem to view any demand that the Government actually govern as being beyond the pale, as best illustrated by Mr. D'Arcy today. How incredible - the opposition won't cover for the second-in-command of the Irish government jetting off to New York St. Louis, Chicago and Boston, during the Dail's first week back in work (after 12 weeks holiday! What, Mary, was New York shut for the summer?). How dare those dirty Blueshirts expect that the Government should now get down to the actual work of trying to save the country - sure isn't that why Mary is going to New York, to wow the Yanks with her talk of the knowledge economy and green jobs? As Ray himself said, shouldn't the whole Dail be banding together to get the country out of this mess, maybe by creating some form of, as Ray put it, "All-Star team", with the best from each party working hand in hand to clean up the unfortunate and highly unexpected recession we are now in. With a Fianna Failer as Taoiseach, I bet, Ray? Maybe that nice Brian Lenihan!

We should never forget just how much faith so many of the main figures in our society have invested in the current administration - so many of our media commentators, so many socialites, so many big business figures, so many overpaid quangocrats. They are terrified that when Fianna Fail get the boot that we might actually get good governance, and the FF myth of the party of leadership will be exposed as the fraud it is. Sure, good governance -  Jesus, that's not very Irish, now is it?

Princely, Enda Ain't!

There was a certain irony this morning to the fact that we had the philosopher Paul Brady on RTE 1 discussing the merits of Machiavelli's "The Prince" as a guide to the modern politician, while on Newstalk we had Charlie Flanagan, Fine Gael TD and spokesperson on Children's Issues, defending Enda Kenny's handling of the recently revealed scandal involving PJ Sheehan, another FG TD. On the one channel we had someone discussing the handbook for the politically ruthless, while on the other, we had waffle and spin designed to defend a decision which seems to define spineless weakness.

For those of you who don't know, and who couldn't be bothered clicking on the link, Mr. Sheehan was stopped by the Gardai leaving the Dail one night last July. He was, in the words of the attached article, '"extremely intoxicated" at the time, to the point that he required assistance to "remain upright"'. However, he insisted on being allowed to drive, and when the Garda in question tried to prevent him, she was told that her career was under threat and that "You'll get nothing from us when we're in power".

Leaving aside the delightful fact that Ireland has now been engulfed by two shameful political episodes in the space of less than a week, both involving alcohol, and from opposite sides of the house, what really stinks here is the complete absence of leadership FG are showing on the issue. Enda Kenny could not ask for a better opportunity to show off his political cojones! A 77-year old TD, who would probably not run in the next election, and who is only the Deputy Spokesperson on Agricultural Affairs is revealed to be undone by the demon drink, and in the process insults and threatens a servant of the state. Straight forward decision, Enda, red card him, announce that you when you are in power no one will be able to abuse their position for personal gain, and state categorically that those who work in the service of their fellow citizens deserve the respect of all. You come across as a great leader, statesmenlike and just, while simultaneously focussing attention on the Government and their refusal to can a Taoiseach who was, ahem, "hoarse" on the job. At worst, you annoy a few hardcore Blueshirts down in Cork South West who believe that it is every man's right to drive while drunk, and sure isn't that what Collins was fightin' for?

Instead, we again have the absolute absence of bravery in the Irish political arena. Kenny (who apparently only learned all the facts yesterday, even though the event happened in July, and Kenny was present at the time, and told the guard to ignore Sheehan!) has decided to deprive the good PJ of the mantle of Deputy Spokesperson on Agri- yadda yadda. So the bould PJ keeps his TD salary, keeps his expenses, keeps his perks, but merely has to stop pretending he cares about farmers nationwide, and can instead go on to only focus on the farmers of Cork South West. Magnificent.

We are always being told by the politicians how tough and underhand the party political environment is: how cut-throat can it be if even threatening a police officer won't lead to you getting the chop? Mr. Kenny, might I suggest you buy this book, and learn how this whole "leadership" thing is actually done.

FG - Never Failing to Disappoint

The recent news that Olwyn Enright will not be contesting the next election for Fine Gael, leaving a gap in the Blueshirt ranks in Laois-Offaly, is both disappointing and understandable. Disappointing because, although she didn't set the world alight (no one ever can in Irish politics), she did seem to be bright and capable, and represented a younger generation of Irish politicians; also, although part of a dynasty, her lineage only went back to 1969 through her father. So practically a newcomer to politics by Irish standards!
Her stepping-down is understandable as, with a young family to raise, a husband representing a constituency in Donegal, and the prospect of ministerial office dim following her part in the heave against Enda Kenny, there is little to entice her to run again.
Now would seem the perfect opportunity for the party of plodding conservatism to run a dynamic candidate, who could galvanise the constituency and get Laois-Offaly ready to see-off the recession. Instead, the speculative candidates being spoken of today include an All-Ireland hurler and another member of the Enright clan.

The hurler in question (and relax yanks, it's not that bad. This kind of hurling, not the kind you experience after a night's boozing) is Brian Whelehan, who, while undoubtedly a great athlete, has been less than successful in the political arena:

Although he performed poorly in the local elections, a senior party source says he will be looked at as a possible replacement for Ms Enright.
"You can't rule him out as he's known in every house," the source said.

You can't rule him out as he's known in every house. That really shows the paucity of thought in Irish politics at the moment, and in particular it shows up how little will actually change even if FG get in to government - and I'm a member, by the way. When will someone actually realise that selecting candidates who can bring more than a well-known face to the political scene will be vital if this country is ever to stagger its way out of recession. With all due respect to Mr. Whelehan, FG should be selecting someone who can actually contribute to the legislative process - that's the whole point of being elected to the Dail, after all.
 
The big question is, of course, will the people of Laois-Offaly fall for this ploy?

The Politics of Failure Have Failed!

- as an alien in the Simpsons once claimed, while disguised as Bill Clinton. In Ireland today, the prophetic words of that "one-eyed space fellar" seem to have become reality. We have a governing party, Fianna Fail,who have (along with their twerpish coalition colleagues, the Greens) frankly handed the opposition an open goal by bringing unemployment to an all time high in real numbers, by bringing about the quickest contraction of the Irish economy in history, and by not seeing how obscene salaries and expenses for legislators could possibly rile the electorate.

However, it is the inability of the main opposition party, Fine Gael, to capitalise on this buffoonery by the incumbents which truly highlights the failure and stagnation of the Irish political system. Some might argue that FG will inevitably fail to tackle FF, simply because the two parties are so similar - centre-right, conservative off-shoots of the original independence movement. However, I disagree - voters in Ireland are by nature centre-right and conservative, so Fine Gael should be able to trade on the fact that they are at least an honest centre-right, conservative party. Their failure is, then, perplexing.

Perplexing, that is, until I heard Jimmy Deenihan, FG TD for Kerry North, on the radio, discussing the plight of Irish hoteliers in the current economic crisis. Basically, perfectly profitable hotels in Ireland are being undercut by "zombie hotels", businesses which have gone into receivership and are now run at below cost. This depreciates the cost of rooms across the hotel sector in Ireland, hitting the bottom line of hotels that should be still viable.

Leaving aside whether dirt-cheap hotel rooms are actually a bad thing for tourism, Mr. Deenihan proceeded to castigate the government for its failure to help the sector. He then called on the government to produce a "strategy" to help the hoteliers.

Ah yes, a strategy. Any hint of what that strategy might be, Jimmy? Any inkling of how we might reconcile the needs of the hotel sector with the requirement to ensure our banks are not undermined by excessive bad debt?

No? No ideas, FG? We're just going to demand the government produces a "strategy", are we? We're going to loudly call on the government to "do stuff"?

At this point, I would like to announce the launch of my own political career. My platform: I am in favour of good things (puppies, sweets, free money), and against bad things (war, taxes, pestilence, Sean Fitzpatrick).

This is not an attack on Mr. Deenihan, who I'm sure is probably a decent, honourable man. But FG as a whole need to learn that standing for something is part of being a political party, and an absolute necessity of being in government. We need ideas, folks, and not simply empty rhetoric.

But surely, this "yay!boo!" approach to politics is characteristic of an older generation of Blueshirts; the younger members must be a little more savvy, right?

Step forth Youn Fine Gael, who last week bravely stood against that most horrid of injustices: an FFer (Finance Minister Brian Lenihan) speaking at the annual Beal na mBlath commemoration of Michael Collins. The reason - FF policies are the exact opposite of everything Michael Collins stood for, while FG continues in the Big Fella's footsteps with its own policies. And those policies would be? Er...

Never mind the fact it is always bad press to attack a dude who has continued to serve in the cabinet (as one of its few able members) while battling cancer. FG needs to learn that if you want to criticise the policies espoused by others, well, fine...but you need clear concise policies of your own.

Now, vote Aitor to receive your free puppy in the mail!

P.S. For purposes of disclosure, I should probably reveal that I am an active member of a political party ...and that my blue shirts match the colour of my eyes.

He's Not the Messiah, He's a Very Naughty Boy...

For lo, a wise man did stand up before a collection of Southside Dublin worthies, and he did say, "Biffo, let my people go!" And the people saw this, and they said that this was good, except for the Unions, cause they hate Michael McDowell.

Yes, former justice minister Michael "Mad Dog" McDowell seems to be coming back, but he is being remarkably coy about in what manner exactly his reemergence will occur. He seems to rule out his running for office in the linked article, and yet his phrasing

“I love my country and I am deeply ambitious for it, but at this point I have to say with this outcome at this stage of my career it makes it very clear that, as far as I am concerned, my period of public life as a public representative is over.”

would seem to leave open the possibility of acting as Chairman of a new party, or of being "encouraged" to run for Fine Gael (at this stage of my career ... as far as I am concerned).

I would dearly love to see a new liberal party start up, but would McDowell merely sink such a movement given the divisive nature of his legacy? Or would he be the cornerstone around which a mighty structure might be constructed?

EDIT: Boy, I said "seems" a lot in this entry. Seems I'm fond of that term...or so it seems.

The End is Night Part III: The Island of No Jobs

The Live Register jumped a staggering 6,600 in May, making a mockery of the government's claim that we have "turned a corner". Such optimism is at best dangerous, at worst treasonous, in the current economic climate. How can an Irish government be so irresponsible as to actually claim that our economy has bottomed out and will soon start the long haul back to some semblance of real growth when multi-nationals lik HP seem set to cut jobs here? How has our economy turned the corner when we still have more than 300,000 houses unoccupied in this country, 32,300 people in arrears on their mortgage (not including the 15 odd thousand who are paying only with government support), and the prospects of ECB rate rises in at least the next five to ten years? How can our economy be on the rebound when we are borrowing €500 million a week, and as the maestro David McWilliams notes, the global markets may soon cut off our supply of credit?

It is becoming increasingly clear that this government is simply kicking to touch, playing for time and hoping that they can avoid as many cuts as possible before the next General Election in 2012. They can then hand the entire mess over to Fine Gael and Labour, who will be blamed by an amnesiac electorate for having to take truly tough decisions, before Fianna Fail can swan into power again, surfing on a wave of pork-barrell promises.

I do not hate Fianna Fail, the Republican Party, the party of Sean Lemass, the party of the urban worker and the rural labourer. But I hate this government, deeply, totally, instinctively, as they have put the selfish interests of the newly-monied and propertied ahead of the common good. There is nothing more vile or harmful to a society, and especially to a Republic, then "socialism for the rich, and capitalism for the poor". Sadly, this has now become Ireland's official state ideology.

Our Only Hope?

I wonder is it even beggining to dawn on our main opposition party, Fine Gael, that winning the next election will simply not be enough? It's no good if FG simply replace Fianna Fail government hacks, cronies and gombeens with their own insiders, clogging up the apparatus of power with more incompetent, irrelevant bods who are just marking time till they can claim their massive pensions.

No, it's clear that FG need to do much more than simply win the next election; they need to lead a revolution. True, a very boring, grey middle-class kind of revolution, but a very necessary one at that. One based on the appropriate spending of taxes and the slicing down to size of unnecessary pork. Most importantly of all, I would argue that it is vital that FG introduce a major overhaul of the electoral system, introducing a national list system or some other mechanism with which to break the link between national government in Ireland, eh sorry, "Lyonnesse", and the parish pump politics that has hamstrung government on our island with the most asinine of parochial concerns.

But how will Labour, FG's obvious partner in any coalition government, view the above steps, necessary though they are. I would suspect that Labour and the Labourites, prone as they are to bouts of intelligence unbecoming of Irish politicians, will see in the long term the necessity of a national list system. But could they stomach trimming down the fat in our national budget? I'm afraid I think not. Will revolutionary red Labour be the main roadblock to change in our country?